Integrity

I've been thinking about this idea for a long time.  I really wanted it to come out right, and be really well written, and have scriptures, and lots of cool stuff.  The reality is, however, if I keep waiting, it's not going to happen at all.  So, I'm just going to let my fingers fly, and see if you get something out of it. 

Jesus said, "Let your yes, be yes, and your no, be no." 

 I've realized that when it comes to parenting, we often don't tell our children the truth.  We don't mean to, but it's much easier sometimes: 

"We'll be leaving in 5 minutes." (When you know you'll stand around talking longer than that.)

"If you do that again, I'll..." (When you really wouldn't do what you just threatened to do, but you needed something really scary sounding.)

Even things like, "bedtime is 8 o'clock sharp, everyday!" (When you know you'll happily destroy bedtime for the sake of something more fun.)

I've been convicted that my life needs more integrity.  I've never robbed a bank or been guilty of perjury, but I have told lies to my children, my husband, myself, even to my God, so many times it's disgusting!  

"I will get up early tomorrow!"  

"Lord, I promise to pray more."

"Honey, I'll iron those shirts for you."

And why?  Sometimes I just wanted to look good, sometimes I really thought I would follow through but truly lacked the resources to make it happen, maybe sometimes I was just talking.  

But my children and my heart need me to tell the truth.  My heart listens to every word I speak, and if I am consistently sloppy in following through or in speaking foolishly, my heart stops believing what I say.  Then when I need to tell my heart something from the Word of God, it doubts me!

So I've become lots more intentional about the way I speak.  I try to be really careful to not make any commitments I can't follow through on, or just be clear if I'm not sure.  But especially with my children, as I've thought about it, I've realized that I really, really, want them to believe me.  If I say I'll take them out for ice cream, I want them to believe me!  If I say I'll spank them next time, I want them to believe me! And if I say that living for God is the greatest thing in the world, I want them to believe me. 

In some ways, now, I say more.  In some ways, I say less.  But I hope to speak, and live, in integrity.